Don't Hate, Mediate
Pensylvania Confict Resolution & Mediation Services, Inc.
93 Old York Road, Suite 1-427
Jenkintown, PA 19046
Phone: 215-470-0004
eMail Us
PCRMS under Dr. Millicent Carvalho has developed a successful approach to conflict resolution, which utilizes several different approaches to conflict resolution as opposed to the boilerplate (one-size-fits-all) approach utilized by the majority of other conflict resolution practitioners.
School-Based Programs
PCRMS’ services and training facilitate the development of socially acceptable skills and students to increase productive behavior and change maladaptive behavior by challenging the values and attitudes that influence destructive behavior. This pedagogical approach facilitates students’ development of a deeper understanding of themselves, a greater appreciation for their own lived experiences as well as an appreciation of the impact their success or failure, in school, has on the larger community.
PCRMS’ creative training engages and empowers young people to resist the adverse impact of discrimination and structural violence as it affects their development and responses to conflict. We accomplish this goal by training students to recognize feelings that can lead to conflict, and negotiate crucial choices that ultimately affect their lives. Students will develop constructive conflict resolution skills and the habit of paying attention to negative feelings, while identifying positive ways of getting their needs met.
Student Groups Served:
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Collaboration at All Levels:PCRMS engages stakeholders at all levels of the community utilizing multicultural perspectives and outstanding communication skills and mediation tools. |
The Cost of Conflict
We don't need to tell you about the cost of conflict, especially in a school setting. You can appreciate how conflict, among students, staff and faculty and parents directly and indirectly, can affect student-learning outcomes. Conflict cost money, hinders good thinking and hurts relationships. Conflict hinders learning and can take a life.
Notwithstanding a vivid spectrum of philosophies and approaches to conflict resolution has proliferated over the past twenty years, the practice of conflict resolution training for lay people (administrators, teachers, staff, students and parents, etc.) has been slow to incorporate the burgeoning renaissance of theory, especially in their applications to real-life, workplace and community situations.
One problem is that the first step some make in trying to resolve conflict is to immediately appeal to an individual’s intellect rather than the emotional needs that beg to be addressed. Individuals have been known to take a life because they felt disrespected. Appealing to the rational mind in these circumstances, before it can take control and restore calm is a waste of time. PCRMS’ has been effective in empowering students to appreciate the connection between disrespect or perceived disrespect and violent crime in schools and neighborhoods.
Some students lack the socialization to appreciate the value of education or the or ego strength to risk failure in order to learn something new. Integrating conflict resolution and problem solving into the curriculum provides an opportunity to reinforce cultural norms that support and validate the importance of education. Students who are performing below grade level often have little motivation to focus on their studies, especially if they have limited parental support. Student learning must involve parents at every level.
In addition to working with students, parents have to be educated about the importance of education, not only for their children’s benefit but also for themselves. Parents must have the educational skills necessary to reinforce classroom learning. Dr. Carvalho, PCRMS’ founder, spent 10 years at La Salle University providing adult and family literacy programs, GED training and testing (in English and Spanish) and ESL programs (including ESL programs for students who had literacy problems in their first language). Dr. Carvalho served as Chief Examiner of the GED Testing Program at La Salle University’s Urban Studies and Community Services Center. La Salle University received the “EVE” Award from the Department of Labor, in part, for the success of the literacy and GED programs she directed.
Why Cant We Get Along? is a character education program that targets unmitigated conflict at home, on the streets and in schools. This program is individually designed to meet the needs of participants. A boilerplate approach to conflict resolution training is a hit or miss proposition. If it worked, it would be a stroke of genius. However, it is unlikely that a boilerplate approach to training will work long term, particularly considering the changing dynamics of schools and student conflict situations.
It is not uncommon for students to come from single parent homes or foster care and dysfunctional families where violence (hitting, name-calling, and profanity) are socialized behaviors as first responses to conflict. Helping students to develop peaceful ways of resolving interpersonal conflict is a priority for PCRMS. For example, in dealing with students who seem to lack basic home training (for example, saying, please, thank you, excuse me, etc), unresponsive or disrespectful parents, or irate community leaders, it isnt very helpful to focus solely on a few steps that assume that the other party in conflict has been socialized to play by the rules of common courtesy. If that were the case, there would be little conflict to resolve. The Pennsylvania Conflict Resolution and Mediation Services, Inc. (PCRMS) was founded in 2002, to address this problem.
Dont Hate, Mediate is a peer mediation and conflict resolution program that teaches children how to use mediation tools to resolve conflict practically and peacefully. The training is culturally relevant and tailored to the specific needs of participants.
Conflict is a negative feeling or experience. Yet, there are many conflict resolution programs that propose that conflict is neither good nor bad or is a natural part of human interaction. Some even argue that conflict can be good for relationships. Conflict is more than a disagreement or difference in opinion. Conflict is a negative emotional response! Even more disturbing is that most conflict resolution providers tend to be one dimensional in their approach to conflict, and narrow adherents to a specific method. A boilerplate approach to conflict resolution intervention is a hit or miss proposition. If it worked, it would be a stroke of genius. However, it is unlikely that a boilerplate approach to training will work long term, particularly considering the changing dynamics of schools and student conflict situations.
PCRMS training is culturally relevant. It emphasizes practical skills for good communication and a response to conflict that appreciates cultural differences and builds positive relationships, while discouraging violent confrontation.
(Conflict Management Coaching for Teachers and Staff)
Conducted individually or in small groups. Participants have an opportunity to gain insight into their own conflict management styles, and gain conflict resolution skills that decrease negative responses in conflict situations and increase cooperative behaviors.
(Conflict Resolution, Diversity and Leadership)
Additionally, we produce educational podcasts that show people how to deal with unmitigated conflict in the home, on the streets, in schools and around the world. Visit the Radio Show Website Featuring Dr. Carvalho:
Why Can't We Get Along Radio Show